Question of the day

Why aren't people wearing underwear anymore?

And most especially why aren't celebrities who are clearly being photographed from every angle not wearing underwear? Is flashing your cooter the new peace sign? Personally, I'm not happy leaving the house until the biscuit sandwich has been assembled. Clean cotton panties, pantyliner, a little powder and pants or a skirt that falls below the assbeltline. Now my fanny isn't as nice as some of these flashing celebs. But I'd like to think that if I was famous, or even smok'n hot, I would still keep my cookie under wraps.

Frankly, Va-gine-aaahs and Peen-nees-says (as my son pronounces them) are not very attractive. I know this because I was once talked into checking out my lady bits with a hand mirror. And I can say with confidence that as wonderful as the machinery is, it's better left under the hood. So to speak.

But I do recommend donating new bras and panties to Undershare - a great charity that provides clean skivvies to victims of assault. So if you have to do without at least do it for a good cause!

18 comments:

Southern Fried Mom said...

Biscuit Sandwich?!? I don't care who you are, that's funny! My muffin is currently securely enclosed in a layer of the finest cotton granny panties that I probably wore during my last pregnancy. Hell, probably the first one, too.

Samantha said...

Amen to Granny Panties!!!!!!!!!! hehe
Why would ANYONE want to let it all hang out? sheesh

Jenny said...

No one has a pretty vagina.

Just a sad fact of life.

Janet a.k.a. "Wonder Mom" said...

C'mon, you know, they hafta give the crabs breathing room, otherwise they get rambunctious down there.

I love that undershare idea.

Also, I think my cooter is kinda cute. Just sayin'.

I like my panties and liners too though...I'd never introduce the hootch to all of America and beyond. It's cuteness must be maintained...tee hee. I crack myself up.

The Happy Housewife said...

Elephant pants are the way to go...

Lisa said...

ah to the men on that one!

Lisa

Oh, The Joys said...

I'm all about cotton from Target. I have only JUST given up the Granny Panty for a lower rise number - and only done that RELUCTANTLY because my girlfriends told me it was NOT cool for my underwear to be so much higher than my waistband. What?!

Gretchen said...

Right on...

I'll have to check out Undershare. Currently, I send a "care package" of underwear and sportsbras to the local domestic violence shelter.

Lotta said...

Thanks for the love! It fills up the hole in my soul ladies!

Janet - I've never seen your cooter so I'll take your word for it. Still. A little mystery goes a long way!

OTJ - I'm just a package away from the Granny Panties. I've devolved from Victoria's Secrets to Target to Hanes 3-Packs. But I do try to at least buy the bikini style even if that means I've making a muffin top. Plus that looks really sexy when I pull my elastic pants waistline up under my titties.

Andie said...

I love BOYSHORTS. They cover it all up! And they look cute!

Girl, I hear ya! I wish BS would cover that skanky snatch! LOL

Deanna (domestic chicky) said...

TWATWATCH 2006...

She's at it again...what, Britney thinks just because the paparazzi got the cooter shots the last 4 days, they won't need another?? Gah!!

kat said...

Funny! I was wondering the same thing the other day. Panties can be cute + sexy :) If Victoria Secret was smart, they would harness this concept {to wear panties} for a marketing campaign :)

Heather said...

While I do not agree with going commando, I refuse to go the way of grannies! I am a thong gal. The key is buying them a size larger than what you wear. This makes them comfortable. Also, the skinnier the string in the back,the better. As for looking at "myself" in the mirror...tried that with the delivery of my first child. YUCK! I couldn't get past staring at my own a**hole. It was even more horrifying than the front! Needless to say, I passed on the mirror with my second child. Best to keep those sights for the one that has already committed himself to you. No chance for escape for him now!!!!!! :)

HeatherinBeautifulBritishColumbia said...

Gaaaaaaaccccckkkkkk.....I knew I had to come here to visit you, lotta after reading instant gratifications comments - you are just too funny. I'm linking to you and I'll be back to read more about the smell of your toots............. or whatever weird stuff you come up with....

Kevin Charnas said...

oh my god...i'm speechless. honestly. i followed those links and holy shit. HOLY SHIT!!!

WHAT IN THE HELL IS THAT ALL ABOUT?????????


oh my god...
oh...my...GOD!!!!

udandi said...

There's another photo with Paris holding Britney's legs together. You know you've hit bottom when Paris thinks you're flashing too much trash.

Red Rollerskate said...

Dude, my thoughts exactly.

Except for the granny panties. Gap low rise boy shorts. High enough to cover Mom Gutt, but low enough to still be cute. :)

Gael T. said...

Hhhaaaaaa, haaaaa, ok, my undies look almost like that pic!
Now that Mervyn's is kaput, Iam lost...No more granny bloomers!
Who cares about "visable pantie lines", a persons pants shouldn't be so dang tight anyway! lol..
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