The vagina knows

Me: Daughter looks super sick. Doctor sick. Bring her in while I'm working today ok?

Husband: No, she's fiiiiine. She just has a little cold.

Me: No, no really. I can tell she's sick.

Husband: She's fine! I just gave her some Motrin.

Me: Dude. We've been through this before I KNOW when the kids are sick. I am ALWAYS right and you are not.

Husband: So why do you always know. Just cause you're the mom?

Me: Yes. Yes, that's right. They came out of my vagina and endowed me with super powers. I KNOW.

Of course he doesn't bring daughter in to the doctor. So today I bring daughter and son in and they both have double ear infections and bronchitis.

My super powered vagina is at this very moment transmitting a premonition to me. Wait. Listen for it. Ah yes, here it is, Husband will the one getting up with kids all night tonight.

She has spoken.

15 comments:

Tammy said...
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Tammy said...
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Tammy said...
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Tammy said...

Oh man, what's up with Blogger tonight? Sorry about the deleted comments.

Yes, our vaginas are super powered and our uteruses (or is it uteri?) are tracking devices. Similar to metal detectors, I guess.

Merry Christmas to your family, you and your talented female body parts.

See you in dietland, after our final binge on Christmas cookies. Thanks for doing the Biggest Blogging Loser - I really needed the little nudge (and support).

7:01 PM

Oh, The Joys said...

That is hilarious...both the wisdom of the Beaver and that HE will be getting up.

HeatherinBeautifulBritishColumbia said...

Hahaha......good post!!! Don't you just love being RIGHT?

Mrs. T said...

The Vagina is ALWAYS right about these things (and most others). Of course Husband will be getting up.

dianeinjapan said...

What fool dares underestimate Her powers?!

Lotta said...

All hail the vagina.

Tammy - lets pretend we had a comments flame war and I had to delete all your scathing comments.

Paige said...

All hail indeed! He who is not vaginally powered cannot possibly know all that we know to be true. And that truth is that those who do not understand what we know (via our super-powered vaginas) will be getting their asses out of bed to do what we normally do while we sleep in.

Janet a.k.a. "Wonder Mom" said...

That's where I get my super powers from? I never knew.

I should call myself "WonderVaj" from now on.

Heather said...

I must get to work on naming mine immediately. I, too, have always wondered from where my powers came! See, and they say you can't learn anything from blogs! :) It is only fair that he suffer the consequences! Life is all about choices. He chose to ignore the wisdom of the "Might V", therefore he must suffer! (hee-hee)

Andie said...

OMG that totally cracks me up. It reminds me of an episode of that stupid show, "drawn together" on comedy central.

Betsy Wasser said...

One of the superpowers my uterus has is the ability to find stuff in the pantry.

Red Rollerskate said...

Ha! Funny. Good punchline. :)