1. I told my friend Carol that I booked an appointment with my old hairdresser. Not "stylist" but "hairdresser". Carol wanted to know if I was going to be getting a blue rinse at the (quote hands) "hairdresser". And why did I book an appointment at this expensive salon? Cause I had COUPON thank you very much.
2. When my sister Tela said that she wanted to go to an Indian restaurant in the city for her birthday tonight my first response was, "The city! Well I hope there's parking!". My next thought was, "Well I better not wear that jacket I just got from the dry cleaners cause Lord knows it will get all smelly from that Indian cooking!". Then to make things worse, when I packed her gift into a pretty floral gift bag I threw in a couple of packets of coffee. No, we don't drink coffee, but I swiped them from the waterpark hotel room anyways. Cause they were "by that Wolfgang guy, the fancy chef" and so I figured someone would want them.
3. I own a pill splitter. Worse yet, I deliberated with the pharmacist over which pill splitter would do the job the best before I bought it.
I'm sure there's more, but my addled and feeble brain can't think of them right now.