Daughter and husband are both ill with stomach flu. Daughter has moved on to the fevery sad phase and is no longer throwing up. Husband is lying in the dark moaning and puking.
First Conversation: Son in bath, daughter trying to nap
Me: Ok, son it's time to wash your hair. Please stand up.
Me: Yes dude, we need to get it clean.
Son: (Scoops up a large BUCKET of water and throws it at me)
Second Conversation: 20 Minutes Later
Me: (Poking head in our bedroom) Do you need anything?
Husband: No. The kids are crazy. You are crazy. Keep them quiet. I can't sleep. (Mutters something)
Me: Dude, daughter is sick and son is on day 2 of being told to sit still. Of course they are going crazy. And you knew crazy was on the menu when you married me buddy.
Husband: You guys are insane. Keep them quiet. I'm gonna puke.
That is all. (Laying head down)