Oh, we're buying the Potty Mitts!

Me: (Yelling from bathroom) Husband! Come here! You gotta see this!

Husband: Oh no. What?


Me: Is this? Is this? Is this poo? Is this a big smear of poo on my white shelving unit? The one that is HAND LEVEL to our son when he sits on the potty.

Husband: (Looking cl
oser) Oh my God I think it is. Who's going to clean it?

Me: Oh that's staying there till morning when son can scrub it off man.

Husband: (Exhaling) Dude.

And right after watching the late rerun of America's Psychic Challenge - what do I do? Go check on the kids. AND SMELL THEIR HANDS! And you know you would totally do this too. Son not only had the incriminating crapwaft but (ok this might not be safe for mother's of daughters to read) he had it UNDER HIS FINGERNAILS.

I'm going to be wide awake at 6am waiting for him to come and sneak into bed with me. Cause a mother's love is infinite but there is no way I'm cuddling up with Reese's Feces until he takes bath. A scrubbing so thorough it would had made Joan Crawford weep with joy. Weep!

13 comments:

Katrina said...

Ok its 3am and I just snorted down the biggest laugh in the world so as not to wake the whole house! You're killing me!

And where do I get those potty mitts? I have 4 sons and a husband...need I say more?

**snort**

Christina said...

Mine hasn't done this yet, but I know it's only a matter of time...

Rima said...

"Reese's Feces?????"

You slay me!

Jennifer said...

This makes me think of the South Park Mr. Hankey episode, with Kyle the Jew standing in his bathroom holding a turd that just wrote "Noel" on the wall!

I would have been in his bedroom scrubbing him with Clorox wipes before he could stick his hands into his mouth!

IamSusie said...

Oh my God... this reminds me of when my son was potty training and he once played with his poo like PlayDoh and smeared it all over his room after pooping his pants. What a mess... we sold that house but we didn't have to disclose the stink that was once on the door and walls....

Another time my little baby girl was playing with real playdoh and I guess she ate some too. I forgot about until I changed her alarming rainbow poopy diaper. We all still laugh about that one.

Kelly O said...

Dear god....

Anonymous said...

lmao!!!

Grim Reality Girl said...

Been there.... ugh! Follow up post required!!!

Note: Making them clean it helps reduce future nightmares for you -- very good choice!!!

meera said...

ahahaha!!! classic!!!!

canarygirl said...

No. Shitting. Way. ACK!!!!!!!!!

Katie J said...

Oh the whole kids and potty stuff is just so icky, isn't it?

Reeses Feces? Snicker.

g-man said...

I bet you are glad he doesn't suck his thumb then! :) Too funny. Good luck with all that.

Kate said...

All I can say (as a long time lurker and sufferer of Comment Frigidist) is I laughed so hard at Reese's Feces I snorted like a giant pig. Love you...love your blog.