Potty Lotion

Me: (Shaking husband awake) Hey. Hey!

Husband: Mmm? What? Mmm?

Me: The new foot cream the doctor gave me is 30% Urea. That's pee right? Urea's pee?

Husband: Yea.

Me: (Pause) Do you think it's human pee?

Husband: No, of course not.

Me: Whew!

Husband: It's probably animal pee.

(Long silence)

Husband: Stop thinking about it.

Me: Do you think it's rat pee? They always have rats in the lab. Do you think I have rat pee on my feet RIGHT NOW?!

Husband: Go to sleep.

Me: Easy for you to say, you don't have rodent piss on your feet.

Husband: (Rolling over) Love you, g'night.

Me: (Sigh) Fine. G'night.

6 comments:

mommiebear2 said...

Yeah, thats a tad bit icky.

Jennifer said...

Maybe you should drink your own pee and cut out the middle man. From that website you posted, urine is the cure for all your ills! Just reading it cleared up my ear infection!

I've often wondered about that urea thing. I just tell myself that urea is just an ingredient in pee, much like water is.

Mama Drama Jenny said...

Meh. When I was pregnant with Hailey I injected pig intestines hormones into my stomach every day. And a friend of mine took a medicine made from nun's pee. True story.

http://www.heartlandhealing.com/pages/archive/urine_therapy/

adriane said...

There is a huge market for pregnant horse pee. They use the hormones from the concentrated pee to make anti-menopause medicines.

Urea is also a main component to natural dying as a fixative to prevent fading and running.

Erin said...

Lotta's covered in pee! Too funny!

Erin said...

Oh yeah, and be sure to rub your feet all over hubby!