At The Movies With Lotta

I really should not have been surprised about my recent movie theater fiasco. After all, I am the same person that made their way past a very long line of seats when I had to go to the bathroom. Stepping on toes, practically sitting on laps. Only to find myself facing...a wall. As I had gone the wrong way down the aisle. So I had to backtrack across everyone and then some again.

Recently, my sister Tela and I went to see the movie 27 Dresses. We were standing at the front of the concession stand line and had just ordered our popcorn when I had the urge to blow my nose. Normally, nose blowing in public is something I do not do. Nobody needs to hear the snot hitt'n the cotton. But I felt like I really, really had to. So I grabbed a wad of stiff paper napkins and blew.

And then I watched as the counter boy looked at me in utter horror. Not disgust, but abject horror. Apparently, I had a nosebleed and didn't realize it. So the boy had been facing a normal looking, happy woman and then turned his back to grab some popcorn. He turned back towards the same grinning woman a moment later, only now her face was splattered in blood. I looked like I geeked a chicken when the dude's back was turned.

Tela took a look at me and said in a perfectly deadpan voice "I think you have a little something right there" and made the universal touching of the face gesture.

Husband and I went to see Juno this past weekend. Fantastic movie. And uneventful. Almost too much so. We ate at Applebees because it was the only place without a half hour wait. And after the movie, I sat in my chair and embroidered while he fell asleep on the sofa. I don't think the date could have been any more middle aged. Frankly, a little blood would have livened the evening right up.

8 comments:

liv said...

there's nothing like a little blood to generate some excitement. oh, and jerky camera movements--ask the people who filmed cloverfield, seizure inducing movie of the year.

Marymurtz said...

I cannot tell you how much this post made me laugh--I'm still laughing about the "I think you have a little something right there" remark.

Jennifer said...

LOL at you standing there grinning!

Little Monkies said...

I was in a class last night and the professor said something about "When was the last time you ordered popcorn at a movie?" and I shot diet coke through my nose thinking of your perky blood-spattered face grinning at that guy. Through. the. nose. And, of course, I looked like the lunatic of the class. Hysterical. I (heart) your sister.

Belle in Bloom said...

"little monkies" comment almost made me laugh as hard as I did after reading your post. My husband has your kind of luck at movies. He's a star wars geek so he had to go to the midnight showing of the last one. He was seriously annoying like a kid you have to sit on when he's too excited. When we entered the theater he practically ran down the aisle to get a seat, tripped on a seat, threw his coke and popcorn ALL OVER the wall and impaled himself on the arm rest. I laughed so hard and for so long, I was asked to leave the theater until I could "regain my composure".

Lotta said...

Oh My God Belle - I'm dying!

Angela said...

Oh my, I am choking myself from laughing so hard.

First thing I read here is about colon prep infused vodka then this... too hilarious.

And I thought this blog was all about buttons !

Lotta said...

Ang - I have been a little button happy lately.