My patience with son is running mighty short these days. It's not his fault, the dude is helpful and wants to participate with whatever I'm doing. Making dinner, driving, going to the bathroom...etc. But every two minutes it's, "Mom. Hey Mom. Mom. Mommy!". Seriously. Every two minutes. If I'm doing the dishes daughter will grab a puzzle and play on the floor near me. Son will stare at me and mommommomlookitmemom the freak out of me until I pay attention to him.
My initial theory was that he was bored. So we've got him signed up for activities and I set up play dates as often as I can. But it's not taking the edge off. It's like a black hole of mommy need. So then I started doing mommy and me outings. The two of us go swimming together at least once a week. And last weekend we went to Olive Garden for lunch and pretended we were in the movie Ratatouille and the rats were running the kitchen. (Having waited tables at an Olive Garden I can tell you that this isn't too far from reality.) This just fanned the flames of mommy desire.
Today I sat down on the toilet. Waited to hear his feet running towards the bathroom (to tell me the sky was f'king blue or something equally vital) and I snapped the lock shut. Right as his hand was reaching for the knob. And it was totally on purpose so that I could relish the fact that I psyched him out and locked him out. (This move is not unlike my favorite "fake left" supermarket maneuver.) And not only did I not feel guilty, I got a little thrill. Enough so that now I always wait till the kids are just about to reach for the door to snap the lock shut.
And I fully realize that someday I will be drooling on my chin and complaining to the night nurse that my kids never visit me. But right now. I'm totally counting down the days till kindergarten starts. 217 thanks for asking.