15 Years Meme

I adored Slacker Mom from the moment we met at Blogher07. She's funny, smart and let me feel her fake boobies so I could see if they felt real. They did. So I owe her one. And since feeling my boobies would be a huge letdown I'm just going to do the meme she tagged me with instead.

"Think back on the last 15 years of your life. How would you summarize your life in just 10 bullet points."

15 years. So from 21 to 36. (Sweet Jesus, 21 seems like an eternity ago.)

1. Could legally drink. Drank.

2. Dated, lived with, broke up and got engaged to current hot husband.

3. Got pregnant. Birth. Shudder.

4. Pregnant again. Birth. Not so bad because the epidural worked this time motherfucker.

5. Became a stay at home mom with a newborn and toddler.

6. Faked first orgasm.

7. Could legally obtain good prescription drugs. Took them.

8. Snuck down to the basement at midnight to blog.

9. Opened online jewelry shop.

10. Got back in touch with my faith and fell in love with my little family all over again. (And there is no "thou shalt not swear" thank you very much.)

So I'm supposed to tag 5 folks for this meme.

Jenny because her bullet points will kick my bullet point's ass like the ninja writer she is.

I Obsess because Debbie's therapist told her she had to write down every single compliment she gets in longhand. And I think asking her to do a meme would short circuit her ADHD brain right now.

Mama Fidel because she leaves a package of cheese plates and vodka addressed to "whore" at her friend's doorstep. (Note to Mama: Who the hell uses cheese plates? Does your friend really have that much cheese at home that she needs multiple plates for it?)

Jen Duncan and Pam Kitty Morning because I suspect these foxy ladies would decant their Schlitz into a McCoy pitcher before drinking it.

Fess up!


The Introvert said...

Aww man! You should have tagged me. I would've let you feel my fake boobies too.

But I am anxious to see what Jenny has to say :)

Jennifer said...

Lotta, you are too funny! We drink a lot and when we drink wine we have cheese as little nibbles. I think it makes appear more ladylike than lush-like. Besides, we are Southern and you know what strange birds Southerners can be. I had to give her an appropriate gift to go along with the Whore vodka.

That whore is now in Paris. Lucky bitch.

I'm glad your reconnection with your faith still allows you to drop a motherfucker here and there!

jen duncan said...

Girl--if you only knew! I try my best to show my true self online, but I really think you've got the wrong idea about me! Why do you suppose I go days/weeks without a post? 'Cause no one wants to see or hear my truth a good bit of the time!
You did good with your bullets. I'm doing some thinking on it and am making a list of mine as I paint everything that's nailed down today (mother arrives on Friday)I think I'm up to the challenge!

lildb said...

this, Lotta, is based entirely on the assumption that I'm even GETTING any.

compliments, that is.

but you know I appreciate your kick-starting my brain like mad. I do. and besides, anytime you even look my way, I shiver like a puppy and lap your hand like it's full of ice cream and magic. which equates to your inclusion of me in this meme-tagging as, well, not really bearing repeating as a description, b/c I don't want to afear you now that blogging prom is so near and I'm hoping you'll save a dance on your dance card for me and not just run, terrified, when you see me coming with my alpha reactions.

yeah. that. (how britney am *I* today? don't answer that.)

slackermommy said...

I knew your list would crack me up. Totally worth the boobie feel and you are more than welcome to feel 'em again this year. You know, in case you forgot what they feel like.

Maria said...

i've been lurking on your blog for a bit, but this post has me laughing so much I had to post! #7 is my favorite :)