Blogher08: First Download

I think that the conference organizers should be insanely proud of themselves for creating such a gathering. It often felt like it was just a group of women sharing ideas and stories...and oh yes, by the way we blog too. And it was fantastic to sit at a table and have lunch with a conservative mother, a feminist, a business woman and a cancer survivor and enjoy each other's company thoroughly.

Mentally, I'm spent though. My reality of blogging is that in Monday's post you're brilliant, and in Tuesday's you're an asshole. But it's ok. Because someone comes to your site and says, "Oh my gosh! I was an asshole just last week!" Then we all feel a bit better about being fallible a-holes. But in real life it gets a little messier.

We inadvertently step on toes, and say the wrong thing or just plain breathe wrong. And because many of us are so raw with nerves about being at such a large social event it doesn't roll off quite as easily as it does online. And there were some folks there who didn't suffer fools gladly. Being someone that is and will always be foolish in public that was hard to navigate.

I went for drinks with Jenny and Deb On The Rocks at the hotel one night. Deb was a keynote speaker and read a hilarious post about women who can't stop reaching "crisis" in public. I was pretty flattered to be sitting there with Deb so of course I overcompensated to try and show Deb I both admired her and was totally comfortable with the fact that she was gay. So the conversation went like this;

Deb: So, what did you think of the conference?

Me: Oh, gay, yea, it was great, gay. Gay. Totally awesome, gay, you know, go gay!

Deb: (Pause) Where are you going for dinner?

Me: I heard there is this great gay restaurant around the corner and I'm totally, gay, going there. Gay!

So I'm pretty sure she thought I was hitting on her the whole time. A frustrated Midwestern housewife trying to score some conference ass. God! But she was incredibly gracious and sweet, and still owes me $20 for overpriced drinks so we'll talk again soon.

I also embarrassed myself with my roommate a few times, but I lucked out as Of The Princess and the Pea couldn't have been cooler. When we first arrived I was arranging my junk in the bathroom and realized I better clean out my neglected hairbrushes before putting them out in the open. I did so, flushed the evidence and thought nothing more of it. Till later, when the toilet was opened and the giant sized hairball had not been flushed at'all. But was instead sitting front and center on the white toilet seat. Looking for all the world like giant wad of beaver hair had fallen off or out of my granny pants and onto the seat when I used the potty. Nice.

But I felt much better when she was videoed scoping out Grover's package in the Sesame Street lounge. During taping the puppeteers crouched down low, and held the puppets up high within camera range. Princess looked entirely lovely while she was talking to Grover on video. Except that she kept looking down at the puppeteer whenever Grover turned around. The puppeteer that was below the camera shot. So for all watching it looked like she was lecherously scoping Grover's sexy blue junk every time the puppet wasn't looking. To be fair, Grover copped a feel too.

More tomorrow. Right now my kids are very needy of my attention and if I don't rush to pick the belly button lint out of their navels it's a complete collapse. So I'm off to watch 3 hours of Doodlebops and mine for fuzz.

9 comments:

Rose said...

You were awesome! It was great to meet you!

Jenny, the Bloggess said...

Fucking cat just (gay) ate my comment. Fuck.

PS. I can't imagine what it must be like to say something stupid in front of someone you're trying to impress. How awful. For you.

Jenny, the Bloggess said...

PPS. You are so money and you don't even know it. You have no idea what that sheet of paper passed to me in the middle of the room meant to me.

Lotta said...

Rose - You too!

Jenny - Thanks honey! Next time I'm giving you my cell phone so we can hang out at night.

Deb said...

OMG are awesome and I loved spending time with you! My takeaway was nothing like yours, it was more along the lines of you thinking that I ditched out on the bill and am a skanky user and/or a drunk skanky loser and why didn't I ask for your room number to return the money, expect I was worried you would think I was hitting on you.

We weren't kidding when we were talking about the voices in our heads! Well, at least we have company now that we are at home!

Dawn said...

LOL! You're so gay funny. I had fun speaking on the panel with you! And thank you again, for the ring!

lildb said...

i love you more than air.

Mamma said...

You were looking for a piece of ass and you didn't ring my room??

I'm so insulted.

gwendomama said...

hello, subliminal gal. every time i read this to myself and anyone who will listen (my gay husband: i gay HEARD IT. me: shuddup) i almost pee myself?
was it the giving birth? oh yes that may have been it.
still wanting to gay hug you.