The constant barrage of need from both of my beautiful children is out of hand lately. I fear I've created this too. In my mind if I get you (the kid) a drink, snack, toy and cartoon. Then you (the kid) leave me alone. That's the deal right? Not so. Not so. All I've done is put out a sign that the food and beverage service is now open. And the requests are unending. If I say "No" to food or drink because dinner is coming then I must either deal with the temper tantrum or guard the kitchen so I can catch any cookie thieves in action.
I've found that if I keep moving throughout the house. Picking up, making beds, dinner, etc. They are pretty good about leaving me alone. But woe is me if I attempt to sit down and relax. Or work on jewelry. Or urinate. They are humping my leg the second my ass lands.
Today was especially insane. The kids were either losing their marbles or begging me for something. The neighbor kids kept ringing the doorbell. And the phone kept ringing with this persistent marketing research company. It was like a Calgon take me away commercial on crack.
So when I walked outside tonight and saw that the BIG giant purple ball was in my flower beds again I lost it. The ball belongs to our neighbors, The Clampetts. The Clampetts lawn is strewn with fast food wrappers, toys and anything else that happens to blow out of their minivan when the door opens. Usually, I pick up the garbage or the toys and bring them back to their lawn. But this time I went inside, got a knife and stabbed that damn ball. Just one, satisfying stab and the air woooshed out. Then I hid it in our garbage.