Moral Dilemma

Dear Reader,

I've got a moral dilemma and could use your advice.

Recently, both of my kids both had diarrhea something awful. They had that barely make it to the pot on time, full on stomach cramping, awful situation all afternoon long. By the time my husband got home I was quite worried and wondering if they had food poisoning. So he and I went over what they ate again and again, and couldn't think of anything that would be off - or that we hadn't eaten ourselves with no consequence.

When suddenly I yelled, "The cheese! It's the cheese!". My kids are allowed to help themselves to apples, yogurt or string cheese without asking. But I had recently purchased some LiveActive, probiotic (help you poop) cheese by Kraft and told everyone it was, "MOMMY'S CHEESE. DON'T EAT MOMMY'S CHEESE." But in making it the forbidden cheese I made it the irresistible cheese - because they had eaten almost an entire package in one day. Giving them a bad case of the trots.

The fact that they were able to eat an entire package of cheese is a sad statement on my parental observation skills. But in my defense they are stealthy and know how to bury something in the garbage can. Husband had no sympathy for them at all, "They'll sure learn that they need to listen the hard way won't they." Sort of a "let them smoke the cigars behind the barn till their sick" approach. Whereas I felt bad for their fiery little asses.

And now dear reader, we arrive at my dilemma.

Husband can knock back three or four Vitamin Waters a day, at least. So when I go to grab one they're all gone. (And frankly, those are like liquid gold since they go for a buck a piece) So this time after grocery shopping, I pulled out my trusty sharpie and wrote my name on half of them. "MOM'S WATER". But when I showed him he was all, "You gonna write your name in your underpants next?"

Well, this morning I noticed that three of "MOM'S WATERS" were gone. Husband took them to work. But what he doesn't realize is that I mixed up Miralax in most of my waters. Not as some kind of trap mind you. But because I always forget to take the damn stuff, and thought I might stand a chance of getting some in if I premixed it.

So the question is, do I call him and warn him not to drink the laxative waters? Or do I let him "learn" like he had the kids do? Mmm?

33 comments:

Marie said...

Hmm...maybe a call right AFTER lunch to let him know that you "just discovered" it...

one smarmy mama said...

oh, let him learn, baby. let him learn!

Jen said...

I say let him learn. Fill him in on the details when he gets home from work.

angelashupe said...

Call me mean but I am all for allowing him to learn on his own - just as the kids had to. ;-) He'll never touch "Mom's Water" again, I'm willing to bet, lol.

Lotta said...

Or a casual, "Where are those pre-mixed laxative waters?" tonight when I open the fridge.

SoMo said...

I say what is good for the little geese is good for the goose. Let him spend the work day on the toilet. Then you can say, "Maybe next time you won't drink my water." I don't think anyone is going to be eating anything out of your fridge for a long time. LOL!!!

Shannon said...

I always say a day where you don't learn anything is a day wasted. You wouldn't want to take a valuable lesson away from your hubby, would you? I would let him suffer the consequences! :)

Jennifer said...

Oh we're a bad bunch aren't we!? Cigars behind the bar indeed!

Serves him right.

and does he wear your underpants?

Carol said...

Oh I agree with Lotta's advice.........ask where those premixed water with Miralax went to! We can't wait to hear the outcome of this one!!!
libertythreads@charter.net

Karen Sugarpants said...

SO AWESOME. Wait till he gets home. Bwahahahaha!

Amy Kate said...

oh, he'll find out soon enough, yes, he'll find out soon enough. Bwa ha ha.

Domestic Chicky said...

*snort* you KNOW I have to go along with the majority and let him learn on his own...or maybe a well placed phone call this afternoon..."you know those waters you drank today? well..."

Jen said...

I fail to see the dilemma - I mean really, he needs to learn.

Anonymous said...

Isn't that why you labeled them, you know, to remember which were premixed? I say he was warned.

Meg said...

I wouldn't mention it tell he gets home. Bwahahahaha!

Judi said...

Oh snap!

Or should I say, "Oh crap"!

nikki said...

Oh let him learn. Seriously? The best revenge ever, even if unintended.

Kathi D said...

I believe he has already made his thoughts on the subject clear, as to learning lessons.

Lotta said...

Well I tried to call but he was in a meeting. So I can use that in my defense tonight!

Lunch Buckets said...

So what's the dilemma? I don't get it.

Gretchen said...

"Husband had no sympathy for them and was all, "They'll learn that they need to listen." "

Yes, he'll learn too. Seriously, what does he need three or four of them for?

Though unintentional, I certainly appreciate the irony in this.

Please, please, please update us on this!

stinebean said...

omg, I almost blew soup out of my nose reading this one. You really should put a warning on some of these. too funny...

Sarah, Goon Squad Sarah said...

Not that I think a man would ever pit two and two together...

I'd let him poop like crazy for a couple of days and then say - did you drink my laxitive water?

It will be awsome.

Anonymous said...

Dude, what's up with your intestinal tract?

Minnie said...

I'm with Jen, I see no issue, much less a dilema.

heather w said...

Oh please please please let us know the *outcome*!

Lotta said...

Anon - Long story. But basically trying to avoid taking prescription laxatives.

K said...

He needs to live and learn....and I hope he poops for 2 hours.

Erin said...

You just made my day! I, however, would have done it on purpose. Seriously, if I drag three kids to the store to get something for me, and he touches it...ummmm, I don't think so!

Lulu said...

LEARN, BABY, LEARN!!! Be sure to drop hints like, "Oh CRAP! I could just SH**. I was so sure that I still had three of the laxative waters. I guess I forgot to DROP A LOAD of them into the fridge today."

Leah said...

Oh my goodness that is hilarious! One part of me says let him learn and the other part of me says call after a couple hours and then tell him, so he can have at least enough!

jen duncan said...

I have a similar arsenal here so I really can't see why a blow out would ever be seen as a BAD thing. :-)

Anonymous said...

hahaha! btw, the cheese takes a few days to work (up to 2 weeks!), so it wouldn't be that...