Too Much Naked


I always wondered when I would cut my children off from my nakedness. When would we all need more privacy? Well that day has dawned for a reason I didn't even consider. Their bizarre commentary on my body. Son was cut off awhile back, but daughter found herself crossed off the list today too.

Me: (Changing after shower)

Daughter: Mom! It looks like your stomach is throwing up!

Me: What? (Looking down)

Daughter: Here. (Points to a fan of purple red stretch marks). That looks like puke.

Daughter also does like to know what's what with the body so in the interest of womanly education I do my best to answer her questions. Perhaps giving her too much information?

Son: WHAT. Are these? (Holds up a bunch of new, clean pantyliners)

Daughter: Those are for the BLOOOOOOOOOD. The bloooooooood.

Son: (Laughing and chasing daughter around with pantyliners) BLOOD!!!

Daughter: AAAAAH!

Yeah. It's time for some locked doors and a house with more than one bathroom.

8 comments:

Kathi D said...

Lock the doors and keep a shotgun handy.

SP said...

OUCH. I think that comment would have made me cry. I have boys so the cut off point seemed much more clear. The cut off point for their bodies seemed to happen pretty naturally for Thing2 as well. Thing1 is just so completely oblivious/comfortable that walking around with his junk in the wind doesn't even phase him. How do I get HIM to close the door?

Jen said...

We're pretty laid back about nudity in our house. Or at least we were until last Saturday. That's the day my son walked into my room as I was getting dressed, picked my bra up off the bed and said "Here mommy! You can put your big floppy things in here."

Now NO ONE is allowed to see me naked.

erin said...

I'm at the no-nude point right now too. My six year thinks it's completely okay to strip down in front of anyone AND has shown people her butt. She has a no personal space zone going on. Probably because I'm always in some stage of undress and have never closed the door while using the bathroom. It's so hard to be private! ;)

Helena said...

Children are just so flippin' honest!

Anyway, if you want to cheer yourself up by watching something funny and naked pop over to my blog. :-)

Miss Yvonne said...

Ha! the bloooooood!

peony paperie said...

I think my kids are cut off from seeing me WITH clothes on. Today I picked up my daughter (3 1/2) from preschool wearing capris for the first time this year. She rubbed my leg and said "where did you get these?" When I answered, "my closet" she said "you look really silly in these mom!"

AnonLottaFan said...

Ha, that reminds me of the time my 5 y.o. got into my purse and was taking stuff out one by one, saying "this is for the car" (keys), "this is for your lips" (chapstick).
Then she held up a tampon and said "and THIS is for your butt"

What? NO!