This Is Likely The Kind Of Over Sharing My Therapist Warns Me About

For reasons that have nothing to do with birth'n and babies I was recently asked by my lady doctor to do an ultrasound. And no, I did not need a full bladder thank you mam. Which only means one thing. And if you have ever had an ultrasound in your early pregnancy stages you know what I'm talking about. It's plastic, white, vertical and a little bit scary. I don't know what size your OB used, but I'm pretty sure mine modeled hers after John Holmes.

So I was understandably nervous going into the exam room. Which means only one thing for me...wholly inappropriate laughter is imminent. But when the technician came in and she wielded that ultrasound wiener I fully lost it. Tears down my face, streaming with laughter. Why?

The ultrasound technician? She looked EXACTLY like Jenny TheBloggess. Exactly.

Which made me not only cackle like a mad hen but I'm pretty sure I looked happy too. Because it was Jenny! And I have been wanting to eat vodka snow cones with her again ever since that first blogging conference we met at.

The one, I recalled, where we videotaped ourselves waving around a big, pink dildo.... oh no! At this point the hysterical laughter had given way to that silent, shaky kind of laugh where an occasional snort escapes. In the meantime, the technician is standing there, with a bottle of gel in one hand and the wand in the other and asks, "Did you..did you..just want to put it in yourself then?"

The ultrasound was fine. The technician may never recover.

8 comments:

WhyIsDaddyCrying said...

I feel pretty damn confident that if Jenny rolled up in my man-exam with a John Holmes wand and lube, I'd take one for the team. I'm just sayin'.....

Jenny, the Bloggess said...

I'm shocked that you recognized me.

Your results will be back within the week, my adorable friend.

lildb said...

I've often suspected that Jenny moonlights as an ultrasound tech.

Thank you for confirming it for me, brave Lotta. NOW FOR THE TELL-ALL EXPOSE.

Lotta said...

Why - You should be so lucky, Jenny is gorgeous.

Jenny - Let me know who the father is kay?

Lild - Coming soon..

Judi said...

I've missed you Lotta!! You make my day!

Karen said...

That was hilarious! Mostly because I'd have reacted the same way :)

Lulu said...

Thank god you're back...my blogging reality has been a bit lacking without you. woo hoooo!

Anonymous said...

Hm hm.. that's amazing but frankly i have a hard time understanding it... I'm wondering what others have to say....