Ghost Stories and Peanut Butter

Every night for the past week, round about 2 in the morning, our daughter has been coming into our bedroom. She comes in with big, wide eyes and tells us about how she's seen a ghost in the house, or in our room, or in her brother's room. Then with her fears safely passed on to mom and dad, she snuggles between us and passes out.

But once wakened with a ghost story I can't really fall back asleep. So I lay there listening to the chuga chuga sounds of the many night trains of Brookfield, IL. While I tell myself that the shadow in the corner most certainly does NOT look like a revolutionary war soldier, no mam.

Last night I spent the time awake thinking about the questions that I would actually like to ask my ghost seeing daughter, but of course don't:
  1. Dude, seriously? What did they look like? Did you try to talk to them?
  2. Did they happen to say anything like "Lottery" or "Lotteria" and then give you a string of numbers?
  3. Next time a nice one comes by can you ask him or her where I dropped my car keys, they have been missing for days man.
  4. When you are a ghost can you visit any house, like say actor John Hamm's, or do you have to stay in your own?
  5. Can they see us when we pick our noses or go to the bathroom, or do they just freaky-hover by the bed while we sleep?
  6. Is it true that if you imagine a circle of light around you ghosts can't come near you. Or do they just wonder why you are scrunching up your face so hard whenever you lay down in bed?
  7. Are the ghosts of homemakers past pissed off that I use a Swiffer Wet Jet instead of scrubbing the lino on my hands and knees?
  8. Do they feel that movies like Bill Cosby's Ghost Dad are an insult to the spirit world, or is it so awful they find it to be ironic and funny in a Napoleon Dynamite kind of way?
But nope, I tell her there are no such thing as ghosts, only guardian angels. And that she should get some shut eye because her sleep deprived mother will be counting on her to make us lunch and get us to school on time. And she laughs and pretends I'm just kidding even though we both know I'm really hoping that she'll make the peanut butter and jelly sandwiches.

8 comments:

KC said...

Oooo! i want to haunt John Hamm too! But before I'm dead...and we're both naked when I haunt him. Crap, I'm totally thinking of something different, but it still involves John Hamm. heeheehee

Mom O Matic said...

KC - Yeah that's another post entirely....

Nicki said...

I feel for you guys! I'm staying with my mom and dad, who live in an old house, which we've always believed was haunted. This morning my dad told me a whole story about how when he was home alone the fan turned on all by itself, a light went on by itself, a picture fell for no reason and the frame broke apart, and the shower rod fell into the bath tub. Then he said, "OK, gotta go to work!" And left me here! Alone! IN OCTOBER!

Mom O Matic said...

Nicki - That's a poltergeist man! That likely didn't comfort you did it?

Both of my kids claim to have seen a little boy ghost in our home when they were 2 years old. But once they were older they never talked about him again.

They both described him the same way though, curly hair, looking for his mom. Eerie.

areyoukiddingme said...

My TV turns itself on...but it's more of an electrical fault than a haunting.

Everyone claims our building (where I work) is haunted. But as I was sitting there listen to the people downstairs go in and out of the doors, I realized that there's just an air pressure issue. But if they want to worry about it, who am I to worry about it.

My daughter will try to sneak into our bed at night, but she hasn't figured out to tell me she's scared and can't go back to sleep. I'd send her back to bed anyway 'cause I'm mean like that.

WeaselMomma said...

That's a great list of questions! Has anyone else in your house ever seen this?

Kristine said...

There's no such thing as ghosts. There's no such thing as ghosts. There's no such thing as ghosts.

Oh hell, they still scare the crap out of me.

Mom O Matic said...

Weasel - Yes, my son has talked about seeing a little boy ghost too.

Kristine - That's what I keep saying! But I'm still freaked out..